For that "Hard to Buy For" person on your list

A friend recently sent me a link to a handy little kitchen gadget. I’m really tempted to get one of these conversation starters for Rob. I especially admire Hillary's power stance. Interestingly, I can’t seem to find a version for George W. I guess when people think nutcracker, few think dub-ya.

Even more interesting: the variety of products listed towards the bottom of the page. A quick scroll of the “Customers Who Viewed This Item Also Viewed” line-up reveals these other must-haves:

• An Edge Brownie Pan – it’s supposed to be a "chewy edge lover’s dream come true," but honestly, it looks more like a large intestine to me.


• Slingshot Flying Monkey – for when you’ve really lost all your marbles.


• The Ouch Toothpick Holder – in the shape of a man for that after-dinner voodoo that you do so well.


• Personality Trait Beer Bands – a way to mark your territory and proclaim yourself a snob, tease, control freak, desperate, bed wetter, and more! As their description inspires: “Get yours today and never drink backwash again!” Any wonder why I prefer wine?


• "The Ex" Five Piece Knife Set with Unique Holder – “The whimsically unique holder features an anonymous effigy design that can be dedicated to anyone.” Anyone anonymously male, apparently.


• Kyjen Elf Hat – Oddly, the description doesn’t say anything about it being for the dogs.


• Dr. Noys Cat Squirrel -- I thought this was some redneck reference, so I had high hopes for Christmas ideas. Instead, it is sadly just a cat toy. In actuality, though, it looks like either a hairball or a bad toupee balled up in a fit of beer-placated rejection.


• Tee Time Toilet Potty Putter -- Hard to believe there are NO reviews for this gem. Frighteningly, it is "As Seen on TV." More intriguing: customers who bought this also bought a variety of wall sconces. All the better to read the green with?

My absolute favorite:

• Holy Toast Stamper -- Buy this, toast up a loaf of holy Wonder, and prepare to make millions on ebay! Man does not live on bread alone, you know.

P.S. Very interesting to see how often the lists change. Just in the time to post this, the lists of other viewed and purchased items have been updated. Guess a lot of people are checking out Hillary. And trust me -- the Potty Putter people really were also buying wall sconces. I couldn't make that up if I tried!