Attention Shoppers!

A couple of months ago, I was minding my own doomscrolling business on Facebook when an ad caught my eye. Which happens way more often than I’d like to admit. 

The photo accompanying the ad was of an author standing behind her book display in a grocery store. Not a bookstore, not a coffee shop, not a book fair. A grocery store, snuggled between the Produce and Floral departments.

I took the bait and clicked. After much research, I determined that the catchily named National Authors in Grocery Stores Program is indeed legitimate. And it’s been around for over 20 years but mostly in Texas and eastward. Apparently rather recently, a Kroger-family grocery chain local to the Pacific Northwest (Fred Meyer) joined the program.

The gist of the program is that authors sign up with NAGSP for an annual fee. In return, they can schedule “book signings” pretty much whenever they want for as many hours as they want at participating grocery stores. NAGSP handles all the money stuff and communication with the stores and takes a cut of each sale. No other authors are allowed to hold signings at the same time, so there’s no competition. You just set up your table, get comfy, and hope shoppers decide to interrupt their quest for yogurt and laundry detergent to chat with you about your book.

Having an I’m FINE. pop-up in a grocery store sounded weird, quirky, and right up my alley (aisle?). And a fantastic way to extend the relevancy of my highly curated book fair set-up. I signed up right away!

There were a few technical glitches, most notably that my book's UPC wouldn’t scan in the Fred Meyer POS system. It does now and I have to admit, it’s pretty dang cool to swish my book over the scanner and hear a beep as my book and price pop up on the screen! Just like peanut butter or salad dressing!

Today was my first signing. I’m a bit pooped. Oh the irony of the literal pain caused by trying to sell books about chronic pain. So much sitting and lugging stuff around. But overall a successful foray! YAY!

Ready to greet you and block the display of
Multi-purpose Copy Paper! Ooops.

I have never seen an author sitting at a book display in my local Fred Meyer, so I was suspicious that I might be the first/only one giving this a go around these parts. My suspicions were stoked when I received the signings schedule for this week for my division. The division includes all the Fred Meyers in Oregon, Washington, Idaho, and Alaska – a total of 135 stores.

This week, the full number of authors in my division doing book signings is…2. Yep, me and Adam in a town in Alaska whose population would fill less than half of the grandstands at my beloved Clark County Fair. Look at me! I’m a trend setter!

My view for 4 hours.
Much pondering why Zesty Jalapeno Popper Doritos
are called "Late Night." If I'm eating those
late at night, they need to come with Prevacid.

Ray, the guy in charge of the NAGSP, is an unending source of information, advice, and guidelines. My email inbox is smokin’ from all the help!

Among Ray’s suggestions was not to schedule signings on Mondays and especially not in the mornings. Perfect! 

Since I didn’t really know what I was committing to, nor how my stamina might be, I broke all the rules and scheduled 4 hours today (a Monday) – from 9:00am to 1:00pm. I chose a Fred Meyer I go to occasionally and never run into anyone I know. Only a few people knew I was going on this little adventure – one of whom (Rob!) was kind enough to show up to take a few photos. Think of it as a “soft launch.” And soft it was.

When I arrived, the store manager suggested I set up my table over in the Seasonal area – currently “Back to School” supplies. He warned me that there wouldn’t be much foot traffic, as I had chosen a very quiet time to be in the store. I happily explained it was entirely on purpose so I could see how the program worked and learn a few things.

The manager offered to help me set up my table (I declined), invited me to stay as long as I wanted, and wished me well. About 15 minutes later, I was set up and ready to greet the tens of people who grocery shop on Monday mornings.

It was fascinating sitting there as people entered the store. Many people entered clearly on a mission, list in hand, eyes scanning the overhead signage for direction. Some walked right past me without any realization a person and her table were even there. I tried to find a comfortable balance of looking friendly but not desperate, while also appearing approachable and not engrossed in my cell phone. I made eye contact and smiled but I tried not to look too eager.

I enjoyed watching the bustle of store employees and noting that Exercise Gear is the finery of choice for grocery shopping. I loved eavesdropping on moms with their kids going on excited scavenger hunts for teacher-required school supplies. Well, except for Hunter who just wanted to sit on the displays and read his book. Mom was understandably exasperated.

The store’s music was pretty awesome – clearly they are targeting Gen X because it was all ‘80s. Men At Work, Phil Collins, Tracy Chapman, T’Pau. T’Pau!! It got a little weird when Def Leppard’s “Rock of Ages” wafted through the store, but the playlist quickly recovered with some Talking Heads.

I ran a few experiments for entertainment and edification.

First, I determined that Ray was right – having a sign with your pricing means people make assumptions without even talking to you. People who were sincerely interested in my book very unawkwardly asked me the price. The pricing sign has officially been ejected from my Grocery Store Book Tote.

I also determined that standing up is more attention-getting but also more intimidating. More people saw me when I stood up behind my table instead of sitting casually in my carefully chosen camp chair. But more of those folks detoured around the bin of on-sale ketchup to avoid me. Noted: sitting is better than standing.

Confirming what I discovered at the book fair last month, I am hereby giving myself permission not to force conversations. Although Ray suggests greeting people with, “Hello, would you like to hear about my book today?” that’s just not me. And it’s not my target audience.

Chronic pain is a tough and touchy subject. Not everyone wants to talk about it – which is a recurring theme in my book. Indeed, I was amazed at how many folks with canes, scooters, and back/knee braces ambled right by me. A few even read my “CHRONIC PAIN SUCKS!” banner and laughed, saying “You got that right!” as they beelined it for the greeting cards. Another told me about her chronic pain and then proudly explained, “I don’t read self-help books.” Ok then!

I watched one brave woman stop several feet past my table, take a deep breath, nod reassurance to herself, and come back to ask me about my book. She told me a bit about her pain story, clearly testing the waters of talking about her pain out loud. She was not ready to buy a book about her truth – that was obvious. But I was so impressed by her courage to take the first step. Of course, I couldn’t tell her any of that. I could only reassure her she is not alone in her experience and give her my business card.

Counter to stereotypes (and I used to
counter them), a number of the folks
who talk to me about their chronic 
pain are younger than me.

By the time I was packed up and trolleying my display back to my car, I had sold one book. Yep, just one. Yep, ONE! But I made connections with several people, had a few honest conversations, and handed out several business cards – including one to Michael the Security Guard whose mom lives with chronic issues.

In a number of small ways, it felt like I had an impact. A few people even thanked me for writing a book about chronic pain, which was very unexpected and humbling.

So, yep, I guess it's official. I will be signing up for more opportunities to hang out among condiments and office supplies and bananas to help other chronic pain sufferers know they aren't alone. YAY!