No, this isn’t an announcement of the tackling of a never-held desire to get a masters degree in something. Unless there’s a Masters of Wine Tasting. Or maybe a Masters of Llama Petting. Or a Masters of Blogging about Eating Fried Foods. Then we’d have something to talk about. No, it just seems that all of a sudden I am signing up for all sorts of classes around our community that have no grades and give no credits. Just fun stuff to learn because, well, I don’t know much about olive oil or how to make a pie crust or, until today, how to make a Christmas wreath.
My friend Pam invited me to what was billed as a "Free Wreath- and Centerpiece-Making Class" at one of the larger, non-big-box nursery/garden centers in our area. Since Rob and I succumbed a few years ago to the efficiency of having a pre-lit faux Christmas tree, I am now always looking for ways to bring some authentic pine scentedness to our living room. Pine-Sol and Yankee Candles just don’t cut it. So the idea of having a fresh, homemade, FREE stinky wreath on our coat closet door intrigued me.
We arrived shortly before the noon start time and almost immediately had our “How can they afford to do this class??” question answered. The class was free…the materials were not. Everything had a price tag. The little metal circle, the fronds of various greenery, the pre-made bows, the shiny balls.
After some minimal instruction, we were told to browse and select our greenery for weighing. “Embellishments” (the bows and balls) would be added to our cost at the end. I was honestly a little annoyed at what felt like a bait and switch. I nevertheless collected a box of assorted cedar, fir, and eucalyptus fronds hoping they were enough for making a suitable wreath.
I picked and chose carefully, much like one selects toppings at one of those self-serve frozen yogurt places. Sprinkles are awesome; the heavy Gummi Bears are for special occasions. I got a lot of airy cedar and only a few pieces of hefty Noble Fir. My goal was now to pay less for my homemade wreath than I would for one of the much prettier, more professional ones on display in the nursery’s gift shop.
Pam and her sister and I set about sharing the one set of pruning shears and skein of bendy wire. Cathy was making a centerpiece. Pam had wreath-making experience. I spent a lot of time staring at cedar.
Despite the instruction, I really had no idea what I was doing. I stopped and started a few times and kept saying, “Mine is so floppy!” I really should have snagged more of the sturdy Noble Fir pieces. Darn my tightwadiness!
Pam and Cathy were finished long before I was. Cathy’s centerpiece looked awesome. It became art when she glued a bird on it. Several other students stopped in their tracks as they walked by our workstation to comment and admire it.
Pam’s wreath also rocked. It was clear she had done this before. It was big and bushy and the pine cones finished it off perfectly.
Mine, well… The fact remains I am just not a crafty person. At one point, I seriously considered just taking all the pieces home and putting them in a box in the entry way just for the smell. I couldn’t see how anything attractive would come from my floppy cedar. But I had a little “YOU ARE NOT A QUITTER!” chit chat with myself and soldiered on. Eventually, with some strategically placed eucalyptus fronds and an even more critically placed bow (turns out I should have purchased more greenery), I decided I had a wreath I could display with some confidence and words of explanation. I was talked out of trimming off some dangly pieces, the ones that continue to poke incessantly at my irrational need for symmetry. We'll see how long I last.
Deciding to splurge on three berry clusters ($1 each), I was finished and ready to find out how much this masterpiece was going to cost me. I held my breath as the total was tallied and let out a gasp.
$13.22, including tax.
Nothing has fallen off so far, so depending how well the wreath holds up, I just might go again next year. I bet I can make an even better one for $15.
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| This will move inside once we find the door hanger in our Christmas boxes still the rafters. Until then, please pray for no wind. |
1 comment:
Girl. Next year keep the frame and I will show you how to make one from the stuff the wind blows down around your yard. A little of this and that. Fabs. But it was so fun to do this with you. I was thrilled to see your face change from I'm not liking this to "Well now there is something I can be proud to hang."
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