If I were in charge of My Fair...

We’re home! And still exhausted! I will be posting one last Fair blog after this one, to recap and reflect on what was one of the goofiest and most exceptionally fun vacations Rob and I have ever taken. Truly…what a BLAST!!

As dedicated Woodhaven Ramblings readers well know, I absolutely adore my beloved Clark County Fair. I love its feeling of community, its richness of family-friendly entertainment, and its determined focus on animals and 4-H in a world where smartphones and YouTube compete to capture young minds and energies.

But I also have felt a staleness, a lack of creativity, a coasting the past few years. My Beloved Fair could use a boost of new ideas. Our recent trek to the Wisconsin, Iowa, and Indiana State Fairs conveniently provided LOTS of fodder. You know me – I took notes. And pictures.

With hopes and intentions of passing these observations along to A Fair Person In Charge, I give you:


THINGS OTHER FAIRS DO BETTER:

Sponsored benches: The old, creaky, wobbly yellow wooden benches at My Fair are well past their expiration date. They are scary-tipsy and they need to be replaced. I know that takes money. Conveniently, Wisconsin and Iowa have a smart solution. Both Fairs had heavy-duty plastic benches engraved with the names of people who sponsored them. I have no idea if the folks paid for the benches in full or just subsidized them. Either way, I would be one of the first to sign up to sponsor a sturdy bench at My Fair with something fun and Fairish engraved on it. Much more practical than a commemorative brick, I bet I am not the only Fair Fan willing to join this fun-draiser.

Sturdy, easy to clean, doesn't tip backwards.  All good things.

Fans in the horse barn: The Horse Arena at my Fair is one of the worst places to hang out on a warm day. The air is stale and hot and stuffy. It is no fun for the spectators and I can’t imagine it’s any better for the spiffily-dressed riders or their decorated horses. I was astounded that all three state fairs we visited had horse arenas that were areas we sought out to cool down. COOL DOWN! In the Horse Arena! Unheard of!! Although Indiana went all fancy-pants with an air conditioned coliseum, both Wisconsin and Iowa had installed these fancy things called “Electric Fans” in their horse arenas. The fans worked magnificently. There are enough events in Clark County’s Horse Arena throughout the year, I imagine better air circulation and quality would be easily justified and widely applauded.

So breezy and quiet!  So lovely.

Food competition among the vendors: The Sporkies competition in Wisconsin is pure Fair Food Brilliance. Every year, the food vendors at the Wisconsin State Fair create new taste sensations and compete to win a gold trophy in the shape of a spork…and bragging and marketing rights. Each vendor with a Sporkie entry is allowed (and encouraged) to note their Sporkability on their menu. This made it super fun and easy for a Fair Food Fan to locate some of the more creative and unique food offerings at Wisconsin’s fair. The day after this year’s Sporkie winner was announced, there was a 19 minute wait to try the Buffalo Cheese Curd and Chicken Fried Taco. I know because I was in that line…and it was totally worth the wait. OMG. (See Day 5’s Fair Food Feast Parade for details.) Honestly, I think a contest like the Sporkies at the Clark County Fair would be a hoot for both the food vendors and the fairgoers. And my hand is already raised to be a judge!

Note the trophy in the corner of the window
on the left.  Also note the line curling
behind the booth. So worth it!

Brochure/List of new foods to try: If food vendors really got into gear, the Clark County Fair could provide fairgoers a list of all the new, fun, creative foods to try. Not only handy for the Fair Food Fiend, but also a fabulous marketing tool for the vendors. Wisconsin and Iowa both handed me map-referenced lists and my tummy was very grateful.

Iowa on the left, Wisconsin on the right.
Both had full sheets of info on the back, too.
These were my people.

Regional foods: Beyond the Sporkies, I loved that both Wisconsin and Iowa featured regional food favorites like cheese curds, cream puffs, and all things pork. I think I have lived here too long to know what food might be quintessentially Pacific Northwest, but I bet there are some recent transplants on the Fair Board who would have a few ideas of what we think is common but is actually sort of unique food here.

Wisconsin's iconic food comes as a mascot, too!
Cravin D. Cream Puff was all smiles to
meet Rob and Piglet.

Green sawdust in show rings: I have no idea if this is an easy change or not, but I was so surprised by how sharp green sawdust looks in a show ring! We watched the pig tapping competition (officially called something boring like 4-H Swine Showmanship) in Iowa and I LOVED the green sawdust. It looked grassy and fresh and pastural. It was also a fantastic contrast against the neutral colors of the pigs.

That'll do Pig, that'll do.

Judging sheets for each type of animal: Perhaps the biggest stroke of genius we saw at any of the fairs was in Indiana. Next to the show ring prior to each competition, a stack of cards was provided for the spectators so they would have a clue about what they were watching. SO many times I have watched a 4-H or Open Class animal competition having no idea what the judges were judging nor what determined the order of the ribbons at the end. The cards in Indiana were fantastic! We collected all that we could (apparently the Goat Cards were hot commodity; not even the Administration Building had them in stock). This was so simple yet so powerful in helping the fairgoers feel a part of the fair. Clark County, this could be pretty easy and not terribly expensive to implement!

These were so handy!  And granted, printing
on card stock in color on both sides could
get expensive.  But even a large laminated poster
at each show ring could be super helpful.

Avenue of Breeds: Iowa had a great idea to help educate the average fairgoer. One of the barns had a row of pens they called The Avenue of Breeds. Each pen had a different breed of animal, with like animals grouped together. Each pen had a uniform sign explaining the breed, the origin, and distinguishing features. So the fairgoer was able to easily see and learn about the different breeds of cows, sheep, goats, chickens, horses, pigs…the whole shebang! It was pretty cool and very popular. Families with little ones with eager but short attention spans and easily tired feet seemed to especially appreciate this one-stop-shopping approach to seeing all the animals.

Both sides of the aisle were part of the Avenue.

Swag stores: OMG! The bane of my Fairing existence at My Fair! How hard is it to offer the purchase of some brand-building, loyalty-inspiring t-shirts, hats, pins, key chains, and cinch sacks? Clark County had t-shirts and hats about 10 years ago. Then about 5 years ago they attempted to make Fair swag a fundraising opportunity for local non-profits…which resulted in astronomical prices that even this Fair Fanatic refused to pay. Currently, the only souvenir you can get at the Clark County Fair is the milkshake cup from the Dairy Women’s Barn. I have quite a few friends that have extensive collections of the annual cups. One because they are adorable; two because there’s no other memento to gaze at in the damp, dark depths of January to remember your awesomely fun, sunny day at the Clark County Fair last summer. Somehow…SOMEHOW…the marketing folks at all three state fairs we attended managed to figure out how to offer all sort of fair swag. In stores even! Wisconsin had designated days where you could get a discount on this year’s swag if you wore “vintage” swag from prior years. Brilliant! They and Iowa also offered annual pins with a different design each year to encourage collections. I was collecting Clark County pins once. Until they stopped producing them after 2014. BOO!!!!!

A whole store, people.  A. Whole. Store.

Quilting station: An annual discussion amongst my older friends and me at My Fair is the recognition and fear that the fine arts of Home Economics is dying. Canning, quilting, sewing…the entries are dwindling with the skills not seemingly passed down to the next generation. A sign of the times, we sigh. Well, I am here to tell you…Home Econ is not dead in the Heartland! Goodness gracious, all three Midwestern fairs were bursting with evidence of what one might do to entertain oneself during countless blizzards each winter.

Iowa was doing something to help stoke the fires of interest and creativity. One of the rooms filled with quilts (I think there were three rooms total) had about 20 sewing machines set up. Three of them were occupied by young teens when we wandered in. The teens were intently working on sewing quilt squares. A couple of adults were on hand to guide them through the process but for the most part, the girls were learning first-hand that they could sew and quilt.

It honestly struck me as an ingenious way to engage kids and prove to them that quilting and sewing was within their reach. Like any good marketer knows, you get them interested young and you can have a customer for life. I would love to see My Fair set up something similar, perhaps taking all the squares created during the Fair and quilting them together each year for display at the next year’s Fair. How cool would it be for kids (and adults) to see their square as part of a community quilt each year??

I'm thinking just 3 or 4 sewing machines would be enough
at My Fair.  And a couple non-hovery adults to supervise.

Quirky food contests: Iowa had a fascinating solution for getting the public engaged in its food competitions. The Iowa Fair allows anyone to sponsor their own food contest – they just need to provide the category, the prize money, and judges. There were contests for things like “Sandwiches We Like” and “Helen’s Memorial Baking Competition” in honor of someone’s grandma. I loved the idea of opening up the food competitions to more people, both as judges and as cooks.

I love everything about this.  The idea.
The contest.  The name. The hat.

First-time Fairgoer brochure and pin: Our first stop at each fair was the Information Booth (which by the way, My Fair could use a few more of…and Rob and I would happily volunteer shifts!). I would excitedly explain we were from out of state, had 2-3 days, and needed to know what I MUST see, do, and eat to most fully experience Their Fair.

Well, the folks in Iowa were ready for me! In addition to a map, daily schedule, and brochures about the new foods to try, Betty handed me a “Guide for First Time Fairgoers” and coordinating pin. WOW!

The brochure wasn’t terribly specific (“Try some food!” “See some animals!”), but I loved the hospitality it represented. The pin, on the other hand, was fantastic! I proudly put it on my shirt and all day long, food vendors and other Fair employees greeted me warmly, asked about my Fair experience, asked where I was from, made recommendations, etc. In short, the pin prompted each employee to make me feel welcomed and a part of their Iowa Fair Family. Just one of the many reasons the Iowa State Fair was my favorite.

Very much enjoying the First Time Fairgoer Pin!
The pickle beer...not so much.

Simple pleasures: One of the most endearing finds at the Indiana State Fair was easy, simple fun tucked away in corners that might otherwise be overlooked. One grove of trees in the background was an outdoor movie theater featuring lawn chairs and Pixar movies. A barn offered a free miniature golf course constructed by FFA kids. It wasn’t fancy but it sure was a fun, uncomplicated respite from the busyness of the rest of the fair. Along the main concourse, there was an area that might have had two vendor tents but instead the Indiana Fair organizers used the space for garage games with several ping pong, air hockey, and corn hole tables set up. My Fair has had a concerning amount of empty space the past couple of years. I love the idea of throwing a couple of table games up and letting families and friends compete the old fashioned way…without screens, headsets, or handheld wireless controllers.

Add a food truck and this could be a cool pod in Portland.

So yes, LOTS of ideas for ways to make the Clark County Fair even better and more engaging. But as I wandered through the Heartland of Fairs, I also discovered there are a number of things My Beloved Fair does better than any of the Big Time State Fairs we visited. Giving credit where credit is due:


THINGS THE CLARK COUNTY FAIR DOES BETTER:

Grandstand shows, especially in afternoon: One of my favorite things about the Clark County Fair is the variety of shows in the Grandstands, especially the second half of the Fair when there are shows at both 2:00pm and 7:00pm. Rodeo, bull riding, demolition derby, mutton bustin, tuff trucks, monster trucks… The Grandstands is a busy place to watch some good ol’ fashioned rednecky fun. There wasn’t much of any of that at the Midwestern fairs we visited. The Iowa Fair had mutton bustin set up in a small temporary ring near the carnival. The Indiana Fair had a rodeo you had to pay extra for (which we did not choose to do). And that was it. My Fair does a fantastic job offering a variety of shows for free.

The only thing I regret about our travel plans this Fairing
Season is that we missed out on seeing Demolition Derby.
I naively thought it might be at one of the state fairs.
Nope. Bad timing.  BOO!!!!

Lots of strolling entertainers: I had never really appreciated before how much fun energy and interaction the strolling entertainers bring to the Clark County Fair. Lots of people in goofy costumes walking on stilts, riding unicycles or penny-farthings, jugglers and magicians randomly doing tricks along the main concourse. The spontaneity adds to the wonder of Fairing, never knowing what surprise might be around the next barn.

The only strolling entertainer of any sort that we saw during our Midwestern Fair Trek was one guy in Wisconsin. He came out in the afternoon and was a mobile piano player. He was very entertaining and it was a hoot to have to make way for a piano motoring down the street. Rob and I spent quite a bit of time figuring out how The Piano Guy managed to steer his instrument (our fourth theory was confirmed by Mr. Google). But aside from that, none of the Midwestern fairs offered any random fun strolling about the fairgrounds. Great job, Clark County Fair!

These two were new this year and sort of hard not to watch.
The guy on the bike was also a stilter.  Is that a word?

Bigger variety of animals: Wow, color me surprised! I had no idea how unique it apparently is to have 4-H and Open Class competitions for llamas, alpacas, cats, dogs, guinea pigs (fine, I’ll call them cavies), turkeys, chickens, bunnies, and ducks. Wisconsin had three alpacas in a pen inside a vendor tent selling soft socks and hats and sweaters. The Iowa Fair had two alpacas in their Avenue of Breeds but no others were spotted anywhere on the fairgrounds for competitions, shows, or education. Indiana had one llonely llama in a petting zoo of sorts (of sorts because we were only allowed to gaze with admiration; no touching allowed).

Other than that, the only animals that were given the limelight in the Midwest were the Fabulous Fairing Five: cows, pigs, sheep, goats, and horses. Including one cow made of butter. Indeed, the Midwest fairs had some of the finest examples I have ever seen of those livestock but still…I really missed seeing the variety of animals and competitions I am used to at My Fair. And My Fair's Bee Barn…totally unique and possibly one-of-a kind. Definitely something to buzz about.

Not only does My Fair have 4-H Cats,
it has a 4-H Cat Costume Contest.
OH, how I adore My Fair!!

More Fair for 4-H kids: Maybe it’s the difference between county and state fairs, but I love how kid-centric the Clark County Fair feels with its animals and other 4-H competitions. Yes, the presence of 4-H and FFA was obvious in the Midwest, but it all felt a lot more serious and businessy. I didn’t see the ag kids having fun and wandering around with their friends when they weren’t in the show ring or “on herds” (herdsmanship = keeping the animal stalls clean and poopy-free). We went to some super big state fairs where the best of the best show up to compete, but it felt like it was all work and little play for the kids. I so deeply appreciate that at My Fair, the 4-H kids work extremely hard but they also take time to enjoy and experience The Fair with rides and milkshakes and inside jokes with friends on the midway.

These are two of our favorite 4-H Goat Teens who took a
break from goating last Fair to hang out with me and eat
a weird treat that made us all breathe smoke out of our
noses.  That's Fairing at its best right there.

Quieter and less boozy: It was a bit jarring at both the Wisconsin and Iowa State Fairs to discover multiple stages set up as bars to provide food, beverage, and entertainment to adult fairgoers. Local bands were blaring and as the night wore on, parts of both of those fairs felt more like Vegas or New Orleans and less like a family-friendly fair. And with this 21-and-over party atmosphere came a LOT of noise. Bands, deep laughter, glasses clinking. Bar noises.

I realized that one of the things I love but never actively noticed about My Fair is that the sounds of My Fair are of voices…kids and animals. Cheering, clapping, screams on rides, the old timey band guys with banjos and tubas, the strolling performers announcing shows, the roar of engines skidding in dirt. All of these are the soundtrack backdrop to My Fair.

Before our trip, I never really had an opinion about there being alcohol at My Fair. It’s contained in a tent near the Grandstands. I love wine and the occasional darkly bitter beer, so the concept of booze at My Fair didn’t register as a concern. But having now faired where Solo Cups could roam freely about the fairgrounds, I am grateful that My Fair limits where IDs need to be checked. I appreciate that My Fair feels like a family event all the time, even and especially at night. There are lots of places I can go to feel like an adult. One of the things I cherish most about My Fair is that it lets me be a kid for awhile.

I may be in my 50s but I don't have to act
like it. 

Lots of seating for eating and air conditioning: Another thing I have taken for granted at My Fair is how easy it is to find a cool, shady, comfortable place to sit. Whether we are eating or people watching or just taking a break, we can always find a good place to sit down at My Fair (except on the west side near the old timey farm equipment where there is no shade to be found. Is that why that side of the Fair is so unpopular?).

Boy oh boy, did we do a lot of walking at the Midwestern fairs in search of comfortable, clean seating. We found ourselves in horse arenas most often when we needed AC. Oddly, in the commercial buildings where leaf gutter guards and telescoping flag poles are pitched, the only places to sit down were massage chairs or demos to get my shoes cleaned. Thank you My Fair People In Charge for providing lots of seating!

Our Bench.  Sometimes we have to share it with strangers, but often
it is available for our use in the Big Air Conditioned Building.
For resting, snacking, chatting.

Shave ice and Smashers: I had no idea that Hawaiian Shave Ice is a West Coast thing. Sure, yes, it originated in Hawaii but that’s no reason the little ice shaver contraption can’t migrate past the Pacific time zone. I was sooo disappointed to discover that the only icy treats to be found in the Midwest were those horrible sno-cones in flimsy pointy paper cups that disintegrate while you are trying to crunch ice chunks as a pool of syrup drips on your tennis shoes. Well, I guess I did spy a couple Slush Puppy machines. I made that mistake once years ago. HORRIBLE brain freeze.

And need a refreshing drink that isn’t loaded with corn syrup or undissolved sugar granules? You’re outta luck in Wisconsin, Iowa, and Indiana. Pretty much the only non-alcoholic drink options were soft drinks and lemonade. I desperately missed my Strawberry Mango Smashers. Mahalo, Clark County Fair for offering a lighter, fresher, maybe healthier beverage option and properly icy treats!

Had I known this would be my one and only Hawaiian
Shave Ice of the 2019 Fairing Season, I would have had
at least 3 more.  Dang it!!

Lots of water fountains: With the dearth of Smashers and Shave Ices, I drank gallons of water while we were fairing and sweating our way through the Humidity Chamber that is the Midwest. Although it helps tremendously that Rob and I know the Clark County Fairgrounds as if we worked there, I had inadequate appreciation for how conveniently populated My Fair is with water fountains. Free, cold water is a godsend while fairing with a refillable bottle. And not so easy to find in Wisconsin, Iowa, and Indiana.

We quickly learned that we needed to locate bathrooms in order to find water fountains in the Midwest. It was as if the Fine Fair Folks hoped by limiting the water we might buy more soft drinks (oops, sorry…pop) and poorly made lemonade. At My Fair, there are several free-standing water fountains in addition to ones near restrooms, plus soooo many cups of free water offered at the booth for our local public utility. We pretty much are always proximate to free water at My Fair (although another one or two wouldn’t hurt on the south side). That’s very refreshing.

It was a hot day.

Paper products: So very odd to discover that none of the big state fairs provided adequate napkins and paper towels. It was a constant search for napkins, and I was so over the hot air hand dryers in the bathrooms. With 183% humidity, the last thing anyone needed was more hot air. Thank you, Clark County Fair for providing all the necessary disposable paper products.


Fantastically clean and well-stocked bathrooms: The posse of teenagers out in force every year at the Clark County Fair does a fantastic job keeping the tables, bathrooms, and grounds super clean. Tables aren’t sticky, toilet paper rolls aren’t empty, trash does not accumulate or blow around. This was NOT the case at the State Fairs. Granted, those are enormous fairs with huge ground to cover. Nevertheless, I noticed wayward trash, tables sticky with Fair drippings, and I quickly learned to check TP availability before committing myself to a stall. Thank you Teens in the Neon T-Shirts! You ROCK!


Fair-themed re-entry stamps: Yes, this is a super small detail. But it is such an easy and simple way to extend the delight of being at a fair. Yet none of the big state fairs did it. Each day at My Fair, there is a different inky stamp on a wrist or the top of a hand to allow you to re-enter. The stamp might be a cow or a sheep or a squirrel or a pig. Whatever it is, it is a cute and adorable and fun reflection of what you might see at My Fair (ok, the squirrel is a stretch but you get the point). At the state fairs, the stamps were numbers or letters or the Fairgrounds’ logo (a snowflake which seemed terribly odd for a hot August night). So boring and such a missed opportunity for fun and whimsy.



So there you go: my dream list if I were in charge of My Fair. I adore the Clark County Fair and I came home with a new appreciation and awareness of more reasons why it really is Summer's Best Party.  But I am also itching to find a way to infuse some of the Midwest know-how and make my beloved Fair even better.