Howdy, Folks!

Back in December 2019, Rob and I mapped out plans to visit two massive state fairs that are universal “Must Do’s” amongst the Fair Fan set. We hadn’t made any reservations but we had the dates set aside in our calendar and planned to start accumulating confirmation numbers sometime in the Spring of 2020. We all know how that ended up. 

Four years later, we FINALLY put half of those pandemically hijacked plans into action!! Yep, last week we moseyed down to Dallas to experience the State Fair of Texas! YEE HAW!!

Photo taken on Day 2, after I had gotten
myself all swagged up with a Fair-themed 
t-shirt and baseball hat. My popcorn earrings
were from my personal collection and quite a hit!

Yes, the official name is the "State Fair of Texas" as opposed to “The Texas State Fair.” Google tells me that back in the late 1800s, there were two fairs in the general Dallas area that merged. They came up with the elevated moniker to signal a new fair was underway. Plus it sounded fancier. Or more important. Or at least bigger. Which is very Texan.

After spending a few days with family in the exceedingly humid and mosquitoed southern part of Texas, Rob and I arrived at the Dallas Fairgrounds about 45 minutes early on Opening Day. A fellow Fair Fan had clued me in that the first several thousand fairgoers receive a commemorative, brag-worthy button on Opening Day at the State Fair of Texas. We didn’t fly over 1,600 miles to sleep in! Plus, Fair Swag! For free! Off we went!

The coveted Opening Day buttons were something of a secret. I expected to be ceremoniously handed one as my entry ticket was scanned. Instead, we had to ask the nice ladies at the Hospitality Center for our sleep-deprived bounty. Apparently the collectable buttons were all gone by 2:00pm. So not that big of a secret, but still something you are invited to oooh and ahhh over.

OOOH!  AHHH!

We spent 3 full days at the State Fair of Texas, walking nearly 20 miles on asphalt and cement, and putting a dent in our upset-tummy and body aches medications. We probably spent $50 on bottled water – because I only found one operational water fountain on the entire fairgrounds; the rest were either broken or turned off to help induce beverage sales. Sneaky and not very friendly-like. Boo! We lounged in air conditioning a few times, but we didn’t really sit very much because, well, my back is still not super happy in that position after the Dangerous Pants Extrication of late August (see September 9 blog). Nevertheless, despite bodies that seemed to have aged a little faster this year, we faired well!

The weather was perfect by Texas standards, which is to say it was sunny and high-80s – both heat and humidity. We mostly melted. The mid-70s, dry, crisp Fall air when we landed back at PDX a few days ago was heavenly and an instant reaffirmation of my love for the Pacific Northwest. Ahhhhh.

We didn’t arrive in Dallas with much of a plan. A quick scan of the fair’s concert lineup was as familiar and captivating as this season’s cast of “Dancing with the Stars.”  In other words, meh. There weren’t any events like demolition derby or monster trucks to plan around. We did catch part of a daily rodeo – in a blessedly air-conditioned arena with supportive chairs. I would have stayed for the entire show except for my screaming back. Sigh.

Not too bad a photo for a circa 2020
cell phone!

We did have one appointment, though! On Opening Day, we rendezvoused in front of Big Tex with my friend Don. Don is a HUGE fair fan, attending a dozen or more fairs EACH YEAR. Although Don lives in the Midwest, he is able to travel about and swing through quite a few fairs throughout the United States. Don was alerted to my fair blogging by my other Fair Fan Friend, John, probably 8ish years ago. Until this year, Don and I had only been in email contact. But a quick in-person meeting about a month ago in Washington led to another super fun commiseration meet-up in Texas. It’s entirely feasible our paths will cross again on some other fairgrounds! YAY FAIR FRIENDS!

Don was decked out in his New York
State Fair t-shirt and Alaska State Fair
hat decorated with his assorted state
fairs pins. He is serious about fairing! I 
love his enthusiasm and recommendations!
Great seeing you again, Don!

So Big Tex. He’s A Thing. The 55-foot statue wearing a 95 gallon hat is the icon of the State Fair of Texas and appears on soooo much merchandise. He doesn’t live at the fairgrounds year ‘round; despite several information plaques we never learned where he spends the off-season. But, Big Tex’s arrival every year is something of a celebration, as is the unveiling of this year’s belt buckle (Shiner Beer for 2024. I tried some. Not recommended, unless you have a hankerin' for college.). Big Tex has a slow, easy drawl and reads through a loud-speakered script several times per day. His catchphrase is “Howwwww-deeeee, folks!” It appears to be a Texan requirement to snap a photo of yourself and your loved ones eating a Fletcher’s Corny Dog with Big Tex in the background. Since we are not Texan, we enjoyed our pretty-good-but-not-epic Corny Dogs elsewhere on the fairgrounds. We did, however, pose with Big Tex several times throughout our visit. So, not Texan but hopefully at least respectful tourist.

When Big Tex talked, his mouth moved!
Also, the plaque said he started out
as a Santa Claus in a nearby town
and was repurposed as a cowboy in 1952.
Rob and I agreed he looked a lot like
Roy Rogers.

The apparently iconic Fletcher's 
Corny Dog was pretty good! The dog
was a little small; I probably should
have ordered the all-beef version. The
corn batter was thick and indeed corny.

I was surprised – and disappointed – by a distinct lack of animals at the State Fair of Texas. I expected there to at least be a barnful of cows and steers throughout the entire 24-day run of the fair. I mean, it's TEXAS! The land of beef! 

Instead, there were just a couple of large barns that rotated through animals, no more than three different types each day (except for a momentous 3-day weekend in the middle of the fair during which 4 – FOUR! – types of animals share the barn space.) By total luck, we were there on the one and only day that llamas attended the fair. YAY! But it seemed like less than 6 kids were showing llamas. BOO! Otherwise, we saw sheep, goats, and pigs. The handy Septober schedule revealed the bovine arrived on Day 5 and stayed onsite for the rest of the fair. Guess our timing was bad for cow viewing.

How about building another barn to allow
for a wider array of animals each day??
There's enough room on the fairgrounds.
Trust me (and my feet).

Llama Obstacle Course! And one of the boldest
footwear choices I've ever seen a judge make
in a show ring. Fashion boots?! With heels?!

The dearth of llamas came from 5 states, one of which
is the enormity of Texas. Meanwhile, I have walked in 
many parades with the Southwest Washington Llama
Association. Yeah, LOTS more llamas here in the 
Pacific Northwest. I had no idea!

I was also confused by the lack of food and agriculture contests. We went into every single building on the fairgrounds – except the Cotton Bowl (which sits smack dab in the middle of the fairgrounds) since we didn’t really care about Grambling State nor Prairie View A&M. Nowhere in our venturing did we find entries of homegrown tomatoes or bluebonnets or cookies or moonshine. I was so bummed! I love seeing the regional differences in what is grown and consumed.

There was one wall of canning entries, and an adequate number of quilts and interesting arts and crafty creations. We only found a smattering of photos, and the kids’ entries were tucked in a small corner, with a few intermingled with the adult entries. Although I quite enjoyed looking at all the creative ways Texans spend their indoor time, I was disappointed it was all contained in one moderately small – albeit air conditioned – room.

The room was about three times the
size of what is visible in this photo.
Pretty small by Texas standards.

I took a gander. Surprisingly nothing terribly
unusual is canned in Texas. 

Literally a corner for the kid entries.
And not terribly populated. SO SAD!
Kid Art is my favorite.

The pun game in Texas is pretty 
impressive. As is the crocheting.

My favorite piece of Kid Art! I'm still astounded
this was painted by a kid under the age of 9.
I love how Texan it is!

So without animals or events or agricultural exhibits, what DID the State Fair of Texas offer as entertainment?

Three words: cars, shopping, and food.

Don had warned me but I didn’t totally absorb the impact until I saw it for myself. Part of the State Fair of Texas is a full-blown car show. Like multiple buildings, all the brands, with test drives and huge turntables and hopeful dealers wanting your email address. It was bigger than the Portland Auto Show by far.

With a 20-year-old SUV creeping towards 300,000 miles, Rob and I decided to take advantage of the two-fer and chatted up some Honda and Toyota folks while I tested the height and comfort of various passenger seats. We also quite enjoyed the air conditioning and took daily advantage of the cell phone charging kiosk at Honda (much faster and cooler than the outdoor one at Chevrolet). So while a very weird fair offering, the Texas Auto Show at the fair was somewhat helpful given our circumstances.

Rob and the salesman chatted about
the Honda Passport and the unexpected
expenses of hybrid cars. Apparently 
heavy electric batteries wear out 
tires at an impre$$ive rate?

I suppose I could look at a fairgrounds map to report the actual number, but my best guess is that there were 487 different buildings housing things to buy at the State Fair of Texas. Mattresses, scented candles, massage chairs, energy-efficient windows, cowboy hats, beverage accessories, farm equipment. There was also an entire building dedicated to products made in Texas. Most of them were edible – like cookies and honey and ice cream and pickle juice – and many provided free samples. Score!

These massage chairs were quite
popular. And only available for
 test lounging by those 21 years old
and older. I never did see a cocktail
waitress, so I'm not sure why the age
restriction. Out of camera range:
two kids relegated to playing on the floor.

This booth smelled better than the
candle booths. Mmmm, leather.

Fuzzy, cowhide bottle coozies.
I managed to resist.

Truth be told, Rob and I kinda got swept up in the consumer excitement. In addition to the two hats, one t-shirt, commemorative drink cup, and Big Tex Bobblehead souvenirs, we also somewhat impulsively bought something else super practical (in my world, Bobbleheads are a completely reasonable and justified acquisition). Our purchase was “somewhat” impulsive because we told Amanda we needed to think about the product overnight, and then we returned the next day to take advantage of Amanda’s promised Fair Deal. Although she hid it well, I’m sure she was stunned to actually see us again. 

Although it was terribly bizarre to buy a heater in Texas, we are nonetheless pretty stoked to give our new Veito® Blade 1500W Infrared Heater with Telescopic Base a whirl on our front porch (the base and free shipping was the deal part). You know, so we can sit in our comfy outdoor chairs and watch it snow when we get tired of looking at the snow in our backyard. Because front yard snow is very different than backyard snow.

Amanda had just finished working
the Washington State Fair! Not surprisingly,
she sold quite a few heaters over its 3-week run.
Hope Texas treats you well, Amanda!
Thanks for the warmth!

So FOOD! In all honesty, the reputation of the Food Scene at the State Fair of Texas was what put it at the top of my FAIRS TO GO TO list (yes, I have one). Texas’s fair is known to have really creative, over-the-top culinary creations. And it is often the birthplace of treats that other fairs eventually adopt (fried Coke anyone?). In the couple months prior to Opening Day, I was getting almost daily updates on Big Tex’s Instagram account about the various gastro-concoctions making their debut at this year’s Fair. Contests were being held and entries judged, photographed, and hyped. I was duly salivating for weeks!

The list of winners, honorable mentions, and new foods was quite long. I ended up trying 5 of the 10 winners/runners-up by the time we said "see ya" to the fairgrounds. When we arrived on site, the fair food was definitely highlighted. There were 6 pages of the 20-page Fair Visitor's Guide dedicated to food finds. Winners proudly displayed award plaques at their booths from this and prior years. News stories both written and on TV featured, reviewed, and debated the various entries. It was totally my scene and I could not wait to dig in!

As I do, I started slow with a Fletcher's Corny Dog on Day 1. By the late night after Day 3, I was sprawled out on our hotel room’s bed, somewhat patiently waiting for the 4 Tums and 1 Gas-X to mitigate the Fat Bacon Pickle Fry Nachos, Candied Pork Belly Bacon Bites, Fresh Pickle Pizza, and Biscoff Delight Cheesecake I had consumed all on the same day because time was running out.

Although my tummy eventually survived, I do think I owe it a championship plaque. And I will admit I am starting to wonder how many more years I can do this sort of gastronomy adventuring without prolonged regret. Oy.

This pickle pizza was pretty good!
Enough so that I plan to try a version 
at home. My biggest gripe was the sauce
was a white alfredo sauce. I would have
preferred a red sauce. And colder pickles.
 

INCREDIBLE tender pork belly chunks
wrapped in thick, sweet candied bacon.
It was the best pork I've had since the 
Iowa State Fair, and I did not mind
tasting it for several hours after. 
Nevertheless, eventually, Tums.

Super cold (but not frozen)
cheesecake rolled in crushed Biscoff
cookies. If you have been on an airplane
in the past few years, yes, THOSE cookies.
Rob and I shared this and made happy
eating noises the entire time.

The best foods I tried at the State Fair of Texas were the “Drowning Taquitos,” the “Fried Burnt Ends Bombs,” and the “Cotton Candy Bacon on a Stick.” The Biscoff Delight cheesecake should be on that list, too. OH! And Rob’s “The Nephew” sandwich was amazing enough that I am going to try to replicate it with two fresh raised donuts housing juicy beef brisket topped with melted mozzarella. If you like chicken and waffles, brisket and donuts is a natural next step. Trust me.

Drowning Taquitos! 
Three deep fried taquitos filled with
chicken served with a cup of Mexican Heaven.
It was like a Mexican salad with greens, guacamole,
 jalapenos, tomatoes, sour cream, cotija cheese,
and a tangy salsa verde. As good as the taquitos were,
I would order the Mexican salad just by itself. Super tangy
and fresh and all the flavors melded together really well.
  

Fried Burnt Ends Bombs!
The burnt ends were a little mushy, but they
were rolled in hashbrown potatoes and cheese
and fried and dipped in BBQ sauce.
REALLY TASTY!

The Nephew Sandwich!
Juicy brisket topped with melted mozzarella
cheese, some honey, a token leaf of spinach, and
some powdered sugar sandwiched between two
raised donuts. Rob let me have a bite. OMG.
 It was SO GOOD! A perfect sweet savory mouthful.

Some of the worst stuff I tried was Texas wine and beer. It all tasted cheap and novice-y. Blech. I also was disappointed with the Fat Bacon Pickle Fry Nachos – the hot pickles fried up like French fries and then topped with nacho cheese sauce, sour cream, jalapenos, and thick bacon bits sounded like they would blow my mind and tastebuds. Instead, it was a bunch of ingredients that just didn’t blend together well. Yes, I know you aren't surprised, but I was.

The tiny cup was more than enough
to sample this Texan Tempranillo.  

The Pickle Fries looked exactly like
French Fries except for being warm
pickles instead of potatoes. I so 
desperately wanted to love this!
Instead, I threw a lot of it away.

I intended to try the super-hyped and officially Most Creative “Texas Sugar Rush Pickles” – pickles coated in cotton candy and then placed in a cup of fruity cereal, ice cream, and lollipops. But the Day 1 review in the Dallas newspaper said something similar to my Pickle Nachos review – a bunch of ingredients were thrown together without a lot of thought about how they might interact. So I skipped the “Sugar Rush.” I'm not really a fan of sugary cereals anyway.  

Not the "Sugar Rush" and not something
I ordered. We stopped this gal as she was
sipping on this blendered mess of a drink.
She claimed it tasted good, although she
hadn't yet had any of the gummy worms 
topping the concoction, nor the bottles'
worth of Tajin spices rimming the top
two inches of the blender. It had a fair
amount of alcohol in it, which explained
quite a lot.

Overall, I would say the State Fair of Texas is a pretty dang good fair, but not the legendary great fair I was expecting. 

I appreciated the sense of place and tradition with Big Tex and the Corny Dogs and the daily rodeo and the simply enormous footprint of the fair itself. But I missed grass and dirt and hay and any vague sense of outdoorsy nature.

I loved the emphasis on creative food and the hype and culinary anticipation. But it felt like a lot of food creation folks were trying too hard to be shocking instead of delicious. I ate some really tasty stuff, but I also ate some things that really missed the tastebud mark big time.

I loved the silly "Glue A Shoe" contest in the Creative Arts entries (you had to feature a shoe in your creation), but I was so sad not to see any Texas agricultural or homemade food entries. I feel like there's a whole part of Texas and Texan culture that wasn't shared.

The Shoe Chef made from a white
casual loafer was my favorite. I would
have bought one for our kitchen if allowed.

And I was shocked to find such a limited array of animals at the State Fair of Texas. Granted, there was a petting zoo that we elected to skip, but that is just not the same as wandering barns and chatting up 4-H and FFA kids about their animal projects. Texas is a big ag state, but you couldn't tell it by its fair.

Since Rob and I have been to a few state fairs now, I think it’s time to share how they stack up in my Fair World. In order of my favoriteness:

1.   Iowa
2.   Wisconsin
3.   Texas
4.   Indiana
5.   Washington
6.   Oregon

There are 8 state fairs remaining on my GO TO list. Of course, the list seems to get longer, not shorter. Especially when I chat with Don. Rob and I have our eyes on a supposedly monumental Get-Together in the Land of Many Lakes in 2025 – five years after we originally promised ourselves to check it out. Just 11 months to go! In the meantime, I invite you to check out my dedicated @its_the_fair Instagram account for lots more photos and videos of the 3rd best state fair I've been to so far!

Thank you, State Fair of Texas!
You exhausted us and made our
bodies and tummies ache with joy.