Tim was almost gone. And…FAIR!

Yesterday I put away the last few things to fully move into our new kitchen. But I am too exhausted to celebrate.

The After!
We are thrilled with how it turned out.

The Before!
A friend recently said, "I never thought your old kitchen
was outdated until I saw the new version." Truth.

It looked like Tim had his bags packed and was at the front door to leave. YAAAAY!!! But then a schedule changed. BOOOOO!!!

We had planned to have Woodhaven’s exterior painted while we are Fairing. Brilliant, right? No reason to be here for our every-seven-years protection from the copious wind and rain that slams Woodhaven’s cedar siding every winter. Same colors, same locations, with new storm doors installed afterward to hopefully stop the rainy leaks once and for all.

That’s all going along according to plan.

The curveball was our painter’s sudden availability and discounted rate to roll right into the interior painting we had anticipated for the Fall. You know, when it’s raining outside and interior projects are all the rage? 

But nope. Woodhaven is also getting all spiffed up with fresh interior paint in a couple of weeks (same colors, same locations – we like what we like and we’re soooo tired of making decisions). The interior excitement starts right after the Fair. Meaning…the time for prep is now.

Rob had just put all the wall hangings back up. I had just reclaimed our dining room. Our bedroom was almost a sanctuary again. I was down to just a few boxes to move into a pantry. The light at the end of the tunnel was shining bright! Tim was almost gone!

That lasted for about 24 hours.

Pictures are down again. The dining room is once again a staging area for furniture and plants and decorations. Our bedroom is naked. Our front porch looks like we have moved. The almost five months of being ungrounded and in disarray and chaos have suddenly extended. The finish line moved in the final stretch. I’ve been on the verge of tears ever since.

I was thisclose to putting the tablecloth back on.

In the midst of this, we’ve been grieving the death of Rob’s dad…and then reeling from the death of a stepbrother just a month later. Colin was 44 and had lived a troubled life. He didn’t treat his body well, and it finally gave up. The grief for Colin is different, filled with sadness for reconciliations that now will never happen. My heart aches deeply for my mother-in-law who has buried a husband and a son in the span of weeks.

December 1991. Colin and I sat on the curb for
a long time, chatting about all sorts of things.
He had sooooo many questions. That day on the
curb is one of my favorite memories with Colin.

When friends have asked how we are doing, Rob and I just sort of stare into space, grappling for the right words to capture so much sadness, shock, exhaustion, weariness, numbness. We are overwhelmed. And we are surviving.

Adding to the swirl...tomorrow is The Fair. I am trying to muster the energy for exclamation points. Hopefully they will come tomorrow as I enter the Fairgrounds – my home for the next 10 days. I’ve lost track of how many “homes” I have had over the past five months. At least this one comes stocked with comfort food and fluffy animals.

Rob and I are in charge of the Gazebo again this year. We had a blast last year managing the ad hoc Information Booth that is officially The Spot for a fun scavenger hunt for fairgoers. Spreadsheets, notes, emails, administration galore. Totally my thing. I was honored to be asked to oversee it again this year. Now I’m praying I have the energy to serve it and my beloved Fair well.

We officially greet you with information.
And Beanie Babies. Lots of Beanie Babies.

Marketing Maven Jenny has printed up all sorts of signs. We’ve pow-wowed with Trisha in the Prizes & Awards department. Mark at the American Red Cross has filled nearly every slot with volunteers. Our parking passes are hanging from our rearview mirrors. Our new badges are on old lanyards. We are ready??

I have no idea how much Fair blogging I will be doing this year. I’m trying to give myself space and grace. But I also know there’s a very real possibility that once I enter the protective, joy-filled bubble of My Fair, energy will come, sadness and weariness will be paused, and I will get a much-needed escape from far too much reality. Stay tuned.