Introducing Airport Anecdotes!

As Woodhaven Ramblings readers know, Rob and I are part of the highly envied team of volunteers who accompany fluffy therapy llamas to Portland, Oregon’s airport. The unexpected (but increasingly highly anticipated) animals bring distraction, smiles, deep breaths, and good cheer to travelers and airport employees alike. Indeed, some of the llamas' biggest fans are TSA agents. I never get tired of seeing a TSA agent determined to exude an air of authority melt into unguarded fandom while hugging a llama.

As we’ve spent time at PDX, Rob and I started noticing friendly, helpful folks wearing blue jackets and vests scattered all around the airport. Positioned in high-traffic areas, the Blue People are there to answer questions, provide directions, and help make PDX easy to navigate. Yet another reason PDX is one of the very best airports, period.

“We should do that someday! You know, when we retire from our current version of retirement.”

Rob and I asked around and got ourselves on a waiting list with the warning that it can take a few years to get into the Volunteer Information Program (VIP), as the retention rate is very high.

Well…

It turns out that our frolics around PDX with the llamas put us in the “Airport Experience” category of VIP hopefuls. Most people in this category are retired flight attendants, pilots, former airport security people, gate agents, baggage handlers. “Llama Wrangler” is not typical airport work. But since when was Portland – or even me and Rob – typical?

Our unexpected “Airport Experience” status granted us access to the Express Lane to Blue Personhood. In other words, what Rob and I thought would take several years ended up taking a few months. Oops! And WOW!

Live trees! Wood ceiling! Still need to check out
the new Speakeasy upstairs!

Rob and I have been busy getting trained by a slew of mentors. Christine, Jim, Joanne, Tina, Bri, and Mindy have been super helpful touring us around the concourses, explaining Lost & Found procedures, modeling the best ways to explain the locations of Baggage Claim, Uber, and rental cars, and reinforcing the many rules behind our “go lots of places” badges. It has been a firehose of information!

Thanks to scheduling and general impatience, I finished my training and “flew solo” for the first time last night. Rob will likely get his wings in the next week or two. We will then start figuring out what our volunteer schedules will look like, with the hope that we can get shifts at the same time and have our own quirky version of Date Night on a semi-regular basis.

In the midst of our training, it has become obvious that this gig is ripe for fun stories. While many inquiring travelers just want to know where to get their luggage and then find their ride, there are also those oddball situations. Those “didn’t quite think it through” situations. Those “I didn’t see that coming” situations. Those “THIS is why I have a blog” situations.

And so, I am excited to introduce a new and occasional series of blog posts called “Airport Anecdotes!” I have four entries to bring us up to date.

 

The Marine

A young Marine fresh from boot camp came to the Information Booth. He had just arrived and needed to figure out how to get home.

Problem 1: He was surprising his family for Thanksgiving so he couldn’t call them for a ride.

Problem 2: He was 18 years old, so he was too young to rent a car.  Also, not a lot of cash or credit card availability.

Problem 3: The town he lived in was about 200 miles and 4 hours southwest of the airport.

Lots of ground transportation options were explored, the most palatable of which was taking a bus about halfway and then finding an Uber and hoping Mom and Dad would be willing to pay upon his arrival.

Eventually, because the kid was 18 and had like-minded friends ready for adventure, a buddy was contacted and agreed to make the 8-hour round trip to rescue the young recruit.

 

The Lost Grandma

A mom with 3 young children and Grandma arrived in Baggage Claim from Kansas City. They had rented a car through a service called Turo, which is basically an Air B&B for cars. The car is parked in a random spot in Long Term Parking and the customer is given scavenger-hunt-like clues for how to find it. Fun times, especially after a long flight with 3 humans under the age of 5!

Going above and beyond, Rob offered to accompany the group to find their rented minivan. Grandma lagged behind but it was promised she would keep up. Spoiler alert: she did not.

When Rob returned to a public area to retrieve Grandma and escort her to the located minivan, Grandma was nowhere to be found.

Six miles of searching, a dead cell phone battery, two White Courtesy Telephone pages, contact with the Port Police and an Avis ticket counter, and a desperate-not-to-sound-spammy note to a friend in Kansas City via Facebook Messenger finally reunited Grandma with the harried group noshing on Rob-provided snacks in Short Term Parking.

 

The Iceland Air Guy

While hanging out around the Ticketing Hall, a man in his 40s wheeling a large suitcase casually approached us.

“Where is the Iceland Air ticket counter?”

Several hours prior, this would have been an easy question to answer, as Iceland Air had been checking in passengers on Aisle 3. But thanks to slick digital signage, that ticket counter was gone and was now promising the eventual arrival of Hawaiian Air employees to check in lucky duck passengers.

We looked around, verified a proximate airline employee was not Icelandic, and returned to the man who was patiently waiting for guidance. Without any hint of concern or panic, he confirmed he needed to check in for his flight and check his suitcase, as it was clearly much too large to carry on.

“Sir, what time is your flight?”

“2:45”

My watch revealed it was 2:25.

We double checked his boarding pass – and I wanted to double check his pulse. He was FAR too calm and unconcerned that he had arrived at the airport 30 minutes before a flight – and an international one at that – with unrealistic expectations to board an aircraft.

When last we saw him, the passenger no longer bound for Reykjavík was peacefully sitting on a bench next to his suitcase, calling the airline’s Customer Service number for assistance.

 

The Birth Certificates

Three of us Blue People were standing in the Entry Hall among the trees (yes, live trees inside the airport – PDX ROCKS!). A couple in their 40s or 50s approached us. They explained a sister was arriving in about an hour from Phoenix. She was going to get on a flight back to Phoenix less than an hour later. They wanted to know if she would be arriving and departing from the same gate.

After some sleuthing and a visit to the Frontier Ticket Counter, we determined that yes, the arrival and departure would be at the same gate. However, there was still a problem.

The sister was arriving for the sole purpose of picking up original copies of two birth certificates that the wife had clutched against her chest in a folder. The husband and wife did not have clearance to go past security, and the sister would not have time to exit security, retrieve the certificates, go back through security, and get to Gate C16 in time for her flight home.

Fortunately, we had about an hour to come up with a plan.

The good news is, our badges allow us to go in and out of TSA Security without tickets. So, theoretically, one of us could have been shown a photo of the sister and met her at Gate C16 and handed her the documents.

The bad news is, while we can retrieve accidentally left-behind items, we’re not allowed to deliver new items to passengers. You know, security and all.

Thankfully, the TSA agents at PDX are fantastic.

We chatted with an agent who talked with his supervisor. When the sister arrived, she called her brother. She was given instructions where to meet the TSA supervisor post-security who handed her the folder with the birth certificates. Our agent emerged from the secured area with a big smile and a blue latexed hand giving an enthusiastic thumbs up. The couple left the airport grateful, exhausted, and relieved.

 

Ode to PDX…and its unofficial mascots

I’m pretty sure the first time I ever flew through Portland International Airport (known as PDX) was the Summer of 1990. My mom’s side of the family was having a reunion on the Oregon Coast to celebrate my grandparents’ 50th wedding anniversary.

I remember parts of the trip VERY well, as it was when I introduced my new boyfriend to the family as my fiancé. As the room erupted in stunned and excited congratulations, my grandma exclaimed, “Well, TONI!” followed by a hopeful, “Your kids are going to have GREAT hair!” With dark, thick waves in common, she was probably right.

Fresh from shocking my extended family.
They didn't even know Rob and I were dating.
We continued to shock them when there were
no other announcements in the following months.
When you know, why wait?? 

Eleven years later, PDX was my first airport destination after 9/11 as Rob and I flew north to visit friends. The short flight from Oakland was edgily long, as I tried not to stare at the cockpit door. I instead focused on the new Fallish sweater I was wearing, excited that the Pacific Northwest promised cooler, crisper, moister October weather compared to the endless summer temps of the San Francisco Bay Area. It was that trip when I first started to fall in love with the PNW and gave myself permission to imagine moving there some day.

Some day ended up coming very quickly. Our official "We Busted Out of California" date – as sworn to the IRS – was June 1, 2004. One of the key factors in choosing Woodhaven as our new home was its proximity to PDX. With hopes for an early retirement doused with travel, Rob and I deemed 1 hour from a major international airport the most we would consider. Woodhaven checked that box – and many others – so PDX was officially our new Home Airport.

As Rob and I made good on our promise to travel a fair bit, I grew to love coming home to the Portland Airport. The open, airy concourses with tall, peaked ceilings; the quirky shops and restaurants that by requirement reflected local businesses; and of course, the carpet.

There was something about that dark teal industrial flooring speckled with purple, red, and navy dots that just breathed “HOME!” every time it greeted me after disembarking. Imagine my surprise, delight, and relief when I discovered in 2014 that there was a whole tribe of us PDX Carpet Superfans. It would have remained an unknown shared obsession if the PDX Powers That Be hadn’t decided it was time to replace and update the secretly iconic carpeting. A benign announcement set off a storm of cries and pleadings and banding together in weirdness that pretty much defines Portland. As a sign of love, honor, and solidarity, the PDX Carpet Foot Selfie soon became A Thing. I participated with wild enthusiasm. As I do.

Traditional Foot Selfie
circa 2015

This family portrait is proudly framed in 
our guest bedroom

My dear friend Joyce Anne came to visit all
the way from Virginia. We both have bad backs
so we thought this was a most appropriate pose.

Soon the carpet’s untrademarked design was splashed all over hats and mugs and socks and cat collars and luggage tags and earrings and coasters and water bottles and (eventually) pandemic face masks (I’m just naming the PDX carpet swag I have). And serviceable segments of the old carpet were culled and put up for sale, in large swaths as well as bound as doormats or squared off for wall art. Yes, of course I did! Duh!

Doormat in use heading to our back patio.
Second, never-to-be-used doormat in closet.

Hanging in our powderless powder room.

Array of available swag for purchase at the airport
aka Toni's Wish List

With all of this PDX excitement and adoration as a backdrop, you might sense my utter coming-out-of-my-skin THRILL when this happened in April 2022.

Yep, I already had the mask! Ok, fine
I had a few carpet-themed ones to
choose from.

While the world was getting swooped up in Portland Airport Carpet Mania, the intended PDX story got lost in the unexpected flooring hype. Off to the side, largely unnoticed or commented on, a new concourse was being built. Like, brand new and from scratch. Big and gleaming. With lots of windows.

Yeah, the carpet hubbub had been super distracting.

I don’t know exactly how it happened that my llama friends got invited to help celebrate the opening of Concourse D. I just know that Llama Mama Shannon – well aware of my PDX obsession – understood our friendship might be on the line if I wasn't at least offered the chance to join in the Llama/PDX collab. Two of my most favorite worlds were colliding!! IT WAS A BLAST!! And the beginning of what is becoming a super fun relationship between my favorite llamas and my favorite airport.

Just strolling through the ticketing 
area with an alpaca...

Some of the most excited folks
are flight attendants. It might have
something to do with their stressful jobs.

EPIC!

During the Christmas holidays last year, as a way to bring lightness and fun and cheer to weary travelers, the llamas were invited back to PDX to mingle and jingle. They were a huge hit. I mean, like with travelers and gate agents and TSA folks and pilots and flight attendants and restaurant workers and construction crews (because even bigger stuff was in the midst of being built).

Rob has one llama t-shirt.
I have a week's worth of Christmas
llama sweaters.

The smiles and laughter and double takes were addicting. Passengers whose flights were delayed suddenly didn’t care. A crowd who had been diverted due to weather was now grateful for the rerouting. Toddlers who were tired and cranky suddenly had smiles and new attitudes. Visitors new to Portland got the fastest initiation imaginable to the quirky vibe of The Rose City. A woman on her way to see her dying father for the last time expressed quiet gratitude through tears for the fluffy, therapeutic hug. Being able to be a part of those moments that shifted mood and attitude was amazing and humbling. These animals are incredible.

Strolling through the retail area
post-security

I love this photo of Kristy and Lori
helping folks enjoy the llamas!

Another excited flight attendant!

Somewhere in the midst of this, the story and photos and videos went viral. “Therapy llamas at PDX” headlined newspapers and television “feel good” stories all over the world. Yes, world. The Llama Mamas were interviewed (in the wee hours our time) on BBC. A story popped up in a Ukraine newspaper as well as some in Europe and Asia. Glimpses of Rob and me were spotted in the Washington Post, the New York Times, and numerous television newscasts who picked up the fun, colorful, merry story of llamas and alpacas struttin’ through an airport. And then there was social media.

Yeah. Trust me when I say, lots of people learned about the Portland Airport and its unique greeters last December.

Since the wildly popular Christmas appearances, Rob and I have been thrilled to join Lori and Shannon on more visits to PDX. We have a blast casually walking into the terminal from the parking area, waving to stunned drivers in the Departures lanes. We wish we could go slower through the revolving doors so folks had more time to get their cell phones into Video mode, because nobody would believe it without seeing it. We totally snap folks out of their rushed “I’m Traveling” mindset as we meander our way toward Security. We are greeted with uninhibited smiles from TSA Agents as we show our badges to pass through the “Employee” line, with queued travelers hoping the line moves fast enough for them to catch up with us. We take our time on the concourses as bewildered passengers hug and feed and take photos with our fluffy and calming buddies, bringing a peace and distraction the travelers didn’t realize they needed.

This is truly the BEST volunteer gig I never imagined existed.

(Click here to watch the llamas navigate a revolving door like the pros they are!)

Going through security. It was a bit
hectic so it was hard to get a good photo!

Past security and helping people make memories.
Also note the new carpet. Greener, more 
geometric, still means "Home!"

I love when kids walk with us!

Last week, PDX unveiled its brand-new main terminal to the world. It has been under construction for four years. It’s been noisy and confusing but also a case study in how to clearly communicate and provide signage to an ever-changing audience. The airport folks truly did an outstanding job helping travelers manage construction chaos. And it was all worth it because they have created a Pacific Northwest Welcome like no other. It is utterly astounding.

Rob and I got a sneak peek a few days before the Grand Opening, attending a “housewarming party” for folks who worked on the terminal. We arrived with two llamas and stood in awe of what supposedly is an airport terminal but is more like an indoor forest of calm and welcoming.

The ceiling is waves of wood. There are huge windows allowing a flood of natural light. There are live trees – tall ones! – planted in little groves. There are stairs inviting you to sit and pause. There’s a large bar upstairs, allowing great views of either the terminal or the airfield. There’s a large sitting area decorated with a fresh run of the Vintage Carpet, a proper ode to what birthed the community of PDX Superfans. The entire space invites you to breathe. To take a moment. To regroup and recharge. In an airport.

(Click here for a video I took during the sneak peek party. I was near a speaker so I changed the music to something less thumpy.)

All of the materials -- including the wood
for the ceiling -- were locally sourced.

Area to chill and reflect on the 1980s
when the original carpet was designed.

Lots of great media coverage celebrating the 
Grand Opening! The llamas are totally unphased
by being in the spotlight. I do my best to hide
behind them.

There’s a very cool Midwest/PNW/Soulfood restaurant in the new terminal pre-security (think fried chicken with a kale salad). I have every intention of suggesting it for dinner soon despite not having a flight for another month. Yes, I want to go the airport just to hang out. We will need to allow for lots of time to check out the new shops, and maybe have a pre-dinner glass of wine while listening to the live music from the grand piano. 

Or, maybe we will get to join Lori soon. Maybe we will wander the airport with some llamas, inviting snuggles and carrot kisses and photos and bringing some levity and deep breaths to travelers and the folks that support them. Because that’s how PDX rolls.

U.S. Senator Jeff Merkley from Oregon
We don't have proof, but I am here
to tell you he totally did the carrot kiss!

(Senator Merkley was not part of the festivities.
He happened to have just arrived in Oregon
and was off to a meeting of some sort when
he saw the llamas. He and his group were pretty
excited to meet them!)

 

Magic Carpet Ride

I will admit that I was a little late coming to the party for Seattle Seahawks fandom. I jumped on the bandwagon just days before they beat the 49ers for their first trip to the Super Bowl. I still don’t want to talk about what happened on their second trip.

There’s another bandwagon in and around Woodhaven, though, that I am proud to say I was riding in long before it was cool. That doesn’t happen very often with me.

The last time I was in the front seat of a trend was my fascination with sock monkeys. Before that, it was in the ‘80s when I had to rush to my pizza job and threw on my freshly washed Keds without laces. It wasn’t too long after that that I noticed I wasn’t the only one going laceless. It’s because these “I’m hip!” moments are so rare that I remember them so well.

So what's the current fascination that I was proudly enamored with long before it was A Thing?

The carpet at the Portland airport.

It’s such a strange thing to notice, carpet. Unless it is really vivid, like the carpet at The Wynn Hotel in Las Vegas. Or iconic, like the avocado green shag carpet in the house I rented in college.

But in an airport? When there are so many other things to be concerned about, like restroom locations and baggage carrousels and 3oz bottles of liquids? Really, who notices carpet in an airport?

Well, I did. And apparently I had company.

I honestly don’t remember consciously noticing the carpet at first. My awareness of it just built over time. Sort of like aging. Or gnomes.

After we had lived at Woodhaven for a few years and traveled a bit, I started to realize that exiting the plane and casting my eyes on PDX's turquoise carpet with navy blue accents was becoming my first sign of Being Home. Whether we had made a quick trip to California to visit family or a long trip across an ocean or continent for a vacation, I always seemed to sigh contentedly when the acres of greenness greeted me amongst the people movers and gate announcements.

Eventually my joy at seeing the carpet was verbalized. I felt a bit goofy admitting my appreciation for it out loud, even to Rob. But he’s used to me finding happy in odd places.

So it was Rob, not me, who first discovered I’m not the only one with a crazy obsession with an industrial floorcovering. Mere seconds after Rob told me about a Facebook page dedicated to The Carpet at PDX, I eagerly joined the handful of fans, giddy and mystified that others understood the visceral peace evoked by a 1987 synthetic fiber graphic.

That page now has over 13,000 followers. Hello, bandwagon!!

The Carpet’s rise to stardom (seriously -- it's been in USA Today and everything) has been fascinating and weird, much like its hometown. In the beginning, there was a lot of “OMG – me, too!” about the shared devotion to the rug. Then people started taking pictures of it in various forms. I dragged Rob to the airport one night especially to snap this photo:

And then there was this favorite one with a friend who was visiting from the east coast. We share the ups and downs of living with chronic back pain. Meds and prayers and stares were involved in the taking of this photo:

Eventually the photos morphed into people taking pictures of their feet on the carpet, now deemed “Foot Selfies.” These days, you haven’t truly visited Portland unless and until you have Instagrammed or Facebooked a picture of your feet on the carpet.

But the photos are only part of the story.

True to the beauty of American consumerism and capitalism, it wasn’t too long before t-shirts and socks sporting the carpet's graphic were available. I was among the first to snag this walking favorite:

But then, just as excitement was building about the communal appreciation for the airport’s well-worn carpet, it was announced that it was going to be replaced. Yep, that’s right. Torn out, ripped apart, traded in for something new. Just as Portland had finally said, “I LOVE YOU!” the carpet was ditching us.

So Portlandia reacted as you might not expect. With this:

Yes, as quirky and old-fashioned and rustic and hipster as Portland would like you to think it is, it is actually filled with savvy entrepreneurs who can read a wave like a master surfer. And so the metro…and Woodhaven…have been flooded with Carpet-themed tchotchkes.

Earrings, phone covers, t-shirts, coasters, scarves, stickers, water bottles, baseball hats, wallets, key chains, magnets, luggage tags. And that’s just the swag I have. Seriously.

OH! Right. I also have a couple other Carpet Must-Haves: the carpet itself.

Yep. I now have in my possession actual remnants of the actual carpet that actually covered the actual floor of the actual Portland airport. You may gasp in awe.

OK, so I’m not the only one who has pieces like this. Way back in March, four local vendors were chosen to buy the ripped out carpet and do what they wanted with it. One of them was very prepared with a website and planned offerings, so I immediately placed an order for two doormats and a square suitable for framing. And have been waaaaaiiiittttiiiinnngggg ever since. First the stuff had to be carefully taken out, then transported, then repaired, then cleaned, then cut, then bound, then finally shipped to Woodhaven. I guess four months isn’t so bad to wait for a piece (or three!!) of iconic
Portland history?

Naturally, I have been trying very hard to get some paw selfies of our two cats. This has been unsuccessful because they are cats. I will persevere and will post a picture in several years when I am finally victorious.

In the meantime, if you come visit Woodhaven and all the old carpet in PDX is gone, you can still get a foot selfie in our living room. Your Facebook friends and Instagram followers will never have to know.